Lila and Baillie's story - Buy a Bale Winter Appeal

“Sometimes I go for weeks or months without looking forward to anything as I often feel very depressed or crippled by severe anxiety and self-hate, but I always looked forward to riding Baillie.” Lila is sharing her story in support of our Buy A Bale Winter Appeal, which runs until February.  It aims to raise awareness of the impact our therapy ponies have for our participants, and to raise funds to support their care over the winter months.

 

Lila is both a participant and volunteer, and shares what coming to Muirfield Riding Therapy (MRT) means to her,

 

I have been a rider at MRT because I have mental health conditions and riding Baillie gave me joy which is something I feel very rarely. Sometimes I go for weeks or months without looking forward to anything as I often feel very depressed or crippled by severe anxiety and self-hate, but I always looked forward to riding Baillie.

 

Bonding

The bond that is shared between participant and pony is a a big part of the success of our therapy sessions, as Lila explains,

 

It was very thrilling to do something new as I had never ridden before. But most special of all was forming a bond with him, and learning to trust that he liked having me riding on him. I made a friend who was gentle and safe and that eased my sense of loneliness. Because of the terrible things that happened in my childhood I find it very hard to feel safe and connected with people so I feel alone even when I’m with people, but I didn’t feel alone with Baillie.

 

 

Volunteering

Lila doesn’t just come for therapy, but is also part of our 200-strong volunteering community,

 

I am also a volunteer at MRT. I am honestly not very good at it because I find it hard to remember how to do practical things like tacking up because of anxiety and fear of doing it wrong. The MRT team have endless patience with me which is amazing, they never judge me and are always kind and supportive.

 

My dream is to learn to lead the ponies when they have riders. I love leading them round the arena to warm the ponies up, I love walking beside them and feeling their presence and tuning in with them. It is wonderful how the MRT team let me have time to just chat with the ponies or stroke them in the tie-up stalls. Those are the best times for me that can change a horrible day of anxiety into one of peace and wellbeing. Especially as the team have their hands full and are very busy I am so grateful that they let me have these quiet times with the ponies.

 

Acceptance

Being around people is very difficult for me, though nearly always hidden behind my smile, inside I am frightened of all people. I also feel worthless and can’t imagine why anyone would want me around, but at MRT I am slowly learning that these lovely people want me to be there. The MRT team accept me as I am and are always kind, they make me feel I belong and that means the world to me. They also go out of their way to help me get to the riding centre and to events as I can’t drive. MRT is a very special and healing place.